Politics/VOTER PURGE FIELD TRIP
India Crams Dissenting MPs Onto Police Bus After They Ask About 130 Million Missing Voters
Rahul Gandhi and his pals got the full class trip experience: a police bus ride to the station and a stern talking-to.
Politics.
Power, money, and the lying fucks who think you won’t notice.
Politics/Crown Prince of Clownshoes
Democratic Senator Sucks Up to Saudi Butcher Prince, Forgets to Mention the Bloody Corpse in the Room
Chris Murphy, who once pretended to give a shit about a journalist being chopped into pieces, now whispers sweet nothings about Iran and Palestine to the man who ordered the hit, proving that 'principles' are just something to wipe your ass with on the way to a photo op.
Politics/Oh, Fucking Wah
Justice Alito Complains Supreme Court Docket Is Full of 'Emergency' Bullshit
The 'Supreme' Court justice whines that his job is getting too hard because everyone keeps filing 'emergency' shit.
Politics/Clockblocked By Reality
Trump Demands Eternal Sunshine, Gets Told to Eat a Bag of Dark Winter Dicks
Trump posts Cotton's digits, demands permanent sunlight, gets told to fuck off back to his own shadowy past.
Politics/Casual Apocalypse
Trump Tells Nebraska Crowd Iran Could ‘Take Out’ LA and San Diego, Calls It a ‘Small Price to Pay’
The president offered up two major American cities as acceptable war-time collateral for cheaper gas, prompting California officials to call him a dangerous lunatic and the Pentagon to note it's all fucking impossible.
Politics/Absolute Cunt
Trump Faces Scrutiny Over Corruption Allegations Amidst Public Discontent
Experts suggest President Trump is vulnerable to public backlash due to rising prices and accusations of corruption, with Democrats aiming to leverage these concerns in upcoming elections.
Politics/Palletgate
Ballot Bungle Has Trump Raging at Arizona Election Officials Over Literally Nothing
After a vendor shipped 3,000 ballots six days early, a colossal non-issue became the target of Trump's latest 'dishonest' rant, despite the fact the ballots were valid, delivered correctly, and the county was blameless.
Politics/COSPLAYING COLONIAL COCKSURE
Abdul El-Sayed's Guardian Op-Ed Was a Fucking Masterclass in Ignoring His Own State's Senators
In 2010, Abdul El-Sayed wrote for The Guardian that he'd likely never get to vote for an Arab-American for national office in the superior U.S. system. At that moment, at least 16 Arab Americans had already served in Congress, including a U.S. Senator from his own fucking state of Michigan.
Politics/Total Fucking Cowardice
James Talarico's 2020 Mouth-Shitting Comes Back to Haunt His Ass
Democratic Senate nominee now claims his own words on defunding cops were 'out of context' as his campaign scrambles to deep-throat the badge.
Politics/Human Roulette
Senate Candidate’s ‘Irreplaceable’ Endorsement: A Bail Fund That Allegedly Funded a Future Killer
Talarico calls the Texas Organizing Project 'irreplaceable.' The group's bail fund is statistically a fucking nightmare.
Politics/MAGATURD MATH
Trump’s Five‑Alarm Shitstorm: He's Rallying Cows He Already Owns While His Party Burns
Facing a historic midterm ass‑kicking, the president is barnstorming districts he won by 76 points, wonders why midterms are hard, and promises to ‘shove it up their ass.’ His own beef tariffs are fucking the ranchers he came to beg.
Politics/SIGNED IT ANYWAY
Garland's Own Lawyers Called the Parents Memo an 'Anti-MAGA Task Force.' He Signed It Anyway
The DOJ's own report says Biden's White House pushed the school‑board‑parents crackdown past screaming internal objections, then the FBI investigated a mom for belonging to a mom group and owning a gun. Twenty‑five assessments. Zero prosecutions. Formal apologies now available.
Politics/Taxpayer Teat
Trump Pulls His Face Off the Government’s Chest After $1.5 Million Ad Spree
The self‑appointed savior finally admits he’ll stop draining the taxpayer piggy bank for his vanity promos.
Politics/I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL IT IS
Trump Signs Diesel Order, Then Tells the Room He Has No Idea What the Hell It Is
The order lets anyone buy tax-free red-dyed diesel for highway use and might shave about $150 off a $1,575 truck fill-up. GasBuddy’s verdict: “It’s not really a needle-mover,” and the president who signed it told the room, “I don’t know what the hell it is, but whatever it is, it is supposed to be very good,” which is one hell of a product review.
Politics/Bollocks Balloon
Tories Pull £10bn 'Britannia Shield' Defence Fantasy Out of Their Arse
After 14 years of letting air defence rot, the party pledges a magical 'integrated network' to protect the realm, funded by fairy dust and the tears of the poor.
Politics/Toddler Tantrum Law
DOJ Sues University for Letting Undocumented Students Pay Same Rate as Locals
Trump's Justice Department claims Delaware's tuition policy illegally benefits immigrants, arguing a kid from Ohio must pay $42K so a kid without papers can't pay $15K.
Politics/NOT THE PRIZE
Leaders say they nominated Trump for the Nobel again. He already kept last year's medal, and Oslo says that is not the prize.
Cambodia, Israel, and Pakistan say they put Donald Trump up for the 2026 Nobel Peace Prize. The committee will not confirm it. Nominations stay secret for 50 years. He is already holding Maria Corina Machado's 2025 medal. The title did not come with it. Oslo announces on Oct. 9.
Politics/Funding Fury
Justice Dept. Argues Harvard Funding Cut Was Not a Simple Billing Issue
Federal appeals judges consider whether a $2.6 billion research grant cut was retaliation, not a paperwork error.
Politics/FAMILY POWER PLAY
Bolsonaro Clan Secures Senate Majority After Flávio’s Shock First‑Round Win
Flávio Bolsonaro’s 56.1 million‑vote lead and a sweep of congressional seats by his relatives give the right‑wing family a dominant foothold ahead of Brazil’s Oct. 25 runoff.
Politics/Planet-Fucking Pricks
Supreme Court Considers Whether Oil Companies Are Legally Obligated to Pay for the Catastrophe They Fucking Engineered
Exxon and Suncor claim climate change is a global 'everyone's fault' issue, not their profitable lie, as a Colorado county tries to make them cover the costs of the fires their deception helped fuel.
Politics/Refinery Brain
Trump Blames Democrats and Ukraine for Soaring US Fuel Prices, Not Iran War
In a baffling social media screed, the president pins gas prices on a Ukrainian sabotage campaign and ‘Dumocrat’ shutdowns, ignoring the minor issue of a Middle Eastern war.
Politics/Petty Skies
White House Finds Loophole in First Amendment: Just Don’t Let Reporters on the Fucking Plane
A federal judge says you can’t ban them, so the White House just parks the plane a little further away from the reporters.
Politics/MISS CLAIROL'S BITCH
David Rivera Is a $50 Million Anti-Communist Whore
The ex-congressman spent a career screaming about Castro, then secretly took a dictator's cash, called Marco Rubio 'Miss Clairol' in an encrypted chat, and laundered money through a yacht. A judge gave the traitorous prick 10 years.
Politics/Let's Go, Fuck Off
Supreme Court Tells 'Let's Go Brandon' Mom to Take the L, and the Sweatshirt, and Shut the Hell Up
The Supreme Court has declined to hear an appeal from a Michigan mother who argued that her sons' First Amendment rights were violated when they were told to remove sweatshirts bearing the phrase 'Let's Go Brandon.' The phrase is a coded insult directed at President Joe Biden.