Still true, still filthy. Page 26 of the back catalog, newest first.
Tom Cruise's $125 M Iñárritu‑directed venture faces a shaky opening, and the studio’s last‑ditch marketing push is a single tweet that has already racked up 2.2 million views.
Manchester United midfielder Bruno Fernandes said Cristiano Ronaldo remains the greatest symbol of Portugal despite the striker walking out of the national team camp after coach Jorge Jesus told him he would not start against Denmark.
Spurs rookie Victor Wembanyama told a reporter he would never partner with a sportsbook, condemning fellow players who promote gambling.
The relegated underdogs just won the fucking Super League for the first time in 58 years, leaving Warrington Wolves to eat a stadium's worth of humble pie and despair.
The Florida congressman told Fox News Digital that 'Muslim terrorists' endorse Democrats, Ilhan Omar is 'bathed in fraud,' and Britain is now the 'United Islamic Kingdom.' His foreign policy doctrine is a chain email that learned to walk.
Zelenskyy swears to torch the other guy's gas station, because he's not the one who fights like a cunt.
Governor signs bill to tax private ICE detention centers 25% starting in 2028, because nothing says 'fuck you' like a surcharge that takes half a decade to arrive.
Massachusetts Democrat Maura Healey sued ExxonMobil, released a study saying her state needed no new gas capacity, and told voters she would stand up to the fossil fuel industry. Then her residents’ electric bills hit twice the national average, and she wrote Energy Secretary Chris Wright asking him to move a pipeline approval “without delay” before a 2028 deadline. Principles are great until the lights cost double.
Agency claims standing guards national security, hospitality; union calls the rule a disregard for employee rights.
Putin pitched a $20 billion Lukoil fire sale at the same Kremlin meeting where they discussed ending the war. The prospective buyers include the negotiators’ own business circle, and the White House calls it diplomacy. One ethics lawyer calls it an alarming set of entanglements. Both can be true.
Christina Koch, who spent 338 days in space and flew around the moon, will now work a parking lot booth outside an Eagles game as part of NASA's 'Inspiration Tour.'
Prognosticators say the orbiting trash can of international cooperation is a top contender for the Nobel, a move that basically admits the planet below is a lost cause.
The president claims over 20 million seniors get one-time checks from the $2 billion Medicare Improvement Fund to cover premiums while his party eyes Congress
Fatima Zahra Mansouri gets the top job just in time to coordinate World Cup port-a-potties while the king holds the actual power and her party's big plan for women is a three-point pamphlet.
An ethics complaint says the socialist mayor's team spent public money to feed talking points to 200 social media influencers via an official Signal chat set to auto-delete, a scheme his own chief counsel had to train staff to stop hiding.
City Solicitor Jim Timmins told councilors there 'aren't prophylactic measures that can be taken against fraud' after a director stole $136,000 from seniors. The state's Inspector General says fraud hotlines make detection nearly twice as likely. Timmins, the city's lawyer, then said he doesn't know the city's whistleblower policy.
A tiny, shady offshore betting ring is letting clowns wager on major UK banks failing, prompting a flurry of official hand-wringing and proving that if you build a toilet for speculation, dickheads will immediately line up to shit in it.
After the sitcom mogul used a charity podium to call the president a Russian asset and the First Lady an escort, the administration suggested he urgently needs a psych ward, not an award.
After a Guardian investigation uncovered systematic overcharges at the nation’s two biggest convenience‑store chains, five members of the U.S. House demand federal action.
A 24-year-old candidate, Ben Braver, sarcastically thanked the VP for gas prices and got a leg sweep, a $2,000 bond, and 13 hours in a filthy cell. Vance called him a clown from the safety of the stage - a perfect metaphor for a party that outsources all its balls to the police.
The Teufelsrad ride operator is handing out free bike shorts because thousands of professional voyeurs have turned the spinning platform into a cash-for-crotch-shots film set. The solution to this digital rape culture is now a sad little basket of spandex.
Adopted St. Louis resident Michael Goessling learns the Doobie Brothers singer is his dad after a mysterious call and a lucky concert‑date coincidence.
City officials, spooked by shadows and a ChatGPT prompt, whitewash a public artwork of Tutankhamun and Nefertiti after their skin looked a bit too dark for comfort.
After their last Gandhi Jayanti demo got shut down, the satire-turned-street-nuisance Cockroach Janta Party vows a nationwide bug march to Delhi on Oct. 10 to demand an election commissioner's head, threatening to turn any police line into their own personal protest toilet.
Two asylum-seeking Iranian nationals charged with trying to build a bomb for a Yom Kippur attack in Manchester, proving the Islamic Republic's foreign policy is just a shopping list for hardware-store jihad.
The agency wants 'expert integrators' to manage the high‑stakes, high‑stress task of not fucking up trips to the Moon and Mars, applications close before you remember you have a soul.
A Flydubai co‑pilot, barred from flying in Oman over alleged extremist views, stabbed the captain during Flight 1073 from Dubai to Tel Aviv.
Nearly 1,400 workers get the boot days before the president arrives to presumably blow smoke up the area's collective ass.
Mattie Music Group, one of three publishers on a 43-year-old song, decided after a few listens that Olivia Dean’s hit stole its melody. They hired a musicologist to agree, then sued the four richest record companies and 50 “Does” while leaving the actual Grammy-winning songwriter off the complaint. They want up to $150,000 per work, a permanent ban, and the “destruction” of the track. The other two publishers on the original song told them to go fuck themselves.
Texas's top lawman left 730 workdays blank, took 275 out-of-state trips, and spent a fortune of public money on California wine, French duck, and Masters tickets. His excuse: the calendar doesn't show the work he's not doing.
