The facts
NPR reported that midterm advertising spending has surpassed $11 billion, a record according to Ad Impact. An NPR analysis indicated that candidates in four key Senate races allocated over $15 million to fundraising advertisements during the 2025-26 election cycle. President Donald Trump has been actively campaigning in competitive races in Texas, Mississippi, and Kansas. NPR's Danielle Kurtzleben observed that Trump has deviated from his typical midterm strategy of advocating for Republican tax cuts and criticizing Democrats. Kurtzleben noted that while rally jokes, such as comments on Ohio Sen. Jon Husted's physique, engage audiences, they divert attention from crucial economic issues and gas prices that resonate with average voters. The briefing also suggested that typically low midterm turnout, coupled with continued GOP base support for Trump, implies a significant number of MAGA votes are accessible. Kurtzleben commented that Trump's necessity to campaign in strongly Republican states could signal challenges for his party.
Our take
What a sublime, galaxy-brained fucking fiasco. The Republican money cannon is blasting a record eleven billion dollars - a sum so profoundly stupid it could wallpaper every shithole town in Mississippi with hundred-dollar bills - into the gaping maw of 'fundraising' ads. That’s right: they’ve spent more money begging for money than some small countries have, and the best they can muster is a digital panhandler’s cup. Meanwhile, the party’s petulant god-emperor, Donald Trump, is on a pathetic victory tour of states like Texas and Kansas, which are already so red they look like they’ve been marinating in ketchup. He’s not there to persuade a soul; he’s there to jerk off his own ego in front of a captive audience of sycophants who’d cheer if he took a shit on the Constitution and called it a policy plank. His big pivot? Abandoning any pretense of discussing tax cuts or gas prices - you know, the things actually crushing the voters he claims to love - to instead make dick jokes about Ohio Sen. Jon Husted’s physique. What a strategic fucking genius. While people are getting financially sodomized at the grocery store, this orange-haired clown is dedicating his dwindling brain cells to body-shaming a fellow Republican. That’s your economic message, you senile, vanity-obsessed prick? 'Check out this guy’s abs!' It’s like watching a billionaire set a dumpster full of cash on fire and then piss on the ashes because the flames weren’t entertaining enough. The fact that he has to barnstorm deep-red strongholds just to keep his own cult from nodding off is a screaming testament to his irrelevance. And his base? They eat this bullshit with a spoon. They’ll gladly watch him ignore every real issue so he can giggle about a six-pack, because policy is hard and owning the libs with a grade-school burn about a waistline is easy. The entire operation is a multi-billion-dollar grift run by absolute cunts, and it’s working exactly as well as you’d expect: they’re bankrupt of ideas, he’s a irrelevant sideshow, and the country is left holding the bag of steaming, expensive shit. Fucking brilliant. Now, about those gas prices… oh wait, never mind, look at those pecs! Assholes. All of them. Total fucking cunts.
