The facts
The Australian privacy regulator has initiated an investigation into Shenzhen Qingcheng, a China-based software company responsible for the HeyCyan app integrated into Kmart's smartglasses. This action follows public outcry and concerns regarding the covert recording capabilities of the devices. In August, The Guardian reported that Kmart's Anko-branded smartglasses, priced at $89, sold out quickly. These glasses are capable of capturing images and recording high-definition video, leading to widespread apprehension and demands for bans or restrictions. A GetUp petition garnered over 55,000 signatures advocating for restrictions on the glasses, which have been dubbed "pervert glasses." Several local councils across Australia have considered or implemented bans in public venues like swimming pools, and the federal government is contemplating restrictions on their use in government workplaces. Australian privacy commissioner Carly Kind was tasked by the attorney general to assess the privacy implications. Kind had previously contacted Kmart, BDI Technology, Shenzhen Qingcheng, Meta, and Google regarding their respective smartglasses or related technologies. The investigation into Shenzhen Qingcheng was announced on Wednesday after the company failed to respond to Kind's inquiries. The probe also considers concerns raised by third-party analyses of the technology and the company's privacy policy. Kind clarified that other companies contacted would not be investigated as part of this specific process. She highlighted the challenges in applying current privacy law to individuals using such devices, as the Privacy Act primarily applies to companies and Commonwealth agencies, not individuals. Kind suggested that proposed reforms to the Privacy Act, including a shift from a 'reasonably necessary' test to a 'fair and reasonable' test for data collection, would enhance the legal framework for addressing privacy issues related to surveillance wearables. Researchers from the University of Sydney analyzed videos captured by smartglasses, noting a trend towards discreet, point-of-view recording that is difficult for bystanders to detect, with a significant portion of interactions classified as potential harassment.
Our take
Well, aren’t these a bargain? For less than a hundred bucks, you too can become a walking, talking, high-definition prick. Kmart, the discount temple of plastic shit, managed to accidentally arm every weirdo in Australia with a pair of ‘pervert glasses’ that sold out faster than a decent thought in the corporate boardroom. The app that makes them work is from a company called Shenzhen Qingcheng, which is now being investigated because it can’t be fucked to even answer an email from the privacy commissioner. That’s the level of respect for your personal space we’re dealing with here: absolute zero. These cunts are so far off the grid they make a ghost look chatty. Carly Kind, the privacy commissioner, had to go public with an investigation just to get their attention, which is like blowing a fucking airhorn into a black hole. The company’s policy is presumably written in vanishing ink, and the tech is so ‘discreet’ it makes a hidden camera look like a fucking parade float. Let’s be clear: this isn’t a tech innovation. It’s a coward’s charter. The only thing these glasses ‘smartly’ do is let some dickhead record high-def video of you changing at the pool without you knowing. It’s a product designed for the kind of person whose search history is a single, endless scroll. And now local councils are scrambling to ban them from public pools, which is the regulatory equivalent of putting a Band-Aid on a gunshot wound. The real bullshit is that the current privacy laws are about as useful as a screen door on a submarine when it comes to holding the actual user accountable. The law chases the company that won’t write back, while the creepy bastard wearing the glasses gets a free pass. It’s a perfect, piss-taking paradox. So congratulations, Australia. You’ve collectively funded a nationwide experiment in how cheaply a society can sell its own dignity. The answer is eighty-nine fucking dollars. Enjoy your surveillance state, brought to you by the home of the $2 toaster and a pair of glasses that make every wearer look like a total cunt. The future is here, and it’s recording you in 1080p from the next changeroom stall. Make sure you smile for the perverts, you’re the star of the show.
