The facts
President Donald Trump announced on Wednesday plans for South Korea to invest roughly $54 billion to export natural gas from Alaska. This project has long been backed by Republican Sen. Dan Sullivan, who is currently in a competitive reelection contest. This marks the second time in three days that the president has highlighted foreign investment facilitated by his administration's trade policy in states with tight Republican Senate races. Trump made a similar announcement on Monday regarding a steel plant in Iowa. Trump stated that the investment was made possible by his administration's trade agreement with South Korea, which he claimed led to hundreds of billions of dollars in U.S. investments in exchange for reduced U.S. tariffs on South Korean goods. Sen. Sullivan described the project as "huge for Alaska" and mentioned his persistent work on it. The White House stated the project involves an 807-mile pipeline connecting Alaska's North Slope to a liquefied natural gas export terminal in southern Alaska. Officials indicated that construction would take three years, with exports beginning two years later, contingent on full financing. The announcement comes as Trump's approval ratings have declined ahead of midterm elections, and he has expressed a desire to campaign more to promote his administration's accomplishments.
Our take
Here we go again, you absolute fucking grifters. Donald Trump, a man whose approval rating is currently lower than a snake's asshole, has decided the best way to pump up his pathetic numbers is to announce a 54 billion dollar South Korean investment in an Alaskan natural gas pipeline that exists only in the desperate, sweaty dreams of Republican Senator Dan Sullivan. This is the second time in three fucking days this clown has pulled this stunt, after jerking himself raw over a steel plant in Iowa. It’s a transparent, pathetic attempt to buy votes in states with tight Senate races, and everyone with half a brain cell can see the piss stream of lies for what it is.
Trump claims this monumental pile of cash is all thanks to his brilliant trade deal with South Korea, a deal he says swapped lower U.S. tariffs for hundreds of billions in investment. What a load of rancid horseshit. The only thing his trade policy has facilitated is a global reputation as an unstable, deal-breaking dickhead. Now he’s standing in the Oval Office, a venue he’s turned into a campaign prop warehouse, next to a senator who’s so deep in a reelection fight he’d probably suck a pipeline himself if it meant a headline. Sullivan called the project 'huge for Alaska,' which is the political equivalent of a toddler pointing at a drawing of a dinosaur and calling it 'huge for the backyard.'
Let’s look at the 'project' itself, you gullible cunts. An 807-mile pipeline from the North Slope to a terminal in southern Alaska. Officials say construction would take three years and exports would start two years after that, but only if they get 'full financing.' In other words, this whole announcement is a fucking contingent fantasy. It’s a cartoon dollar sign scribbled on a napkin, presented as a multi-billion-dollar deal. Trump is essentially promising that if someone else pays for everything, a thing might happen half a decade from now. That’s not a policy achievement; it’s a wish you make on a fucking dandelion while your presidency circles the drain.
The timing is the most rancid, obvious part of this whole charade. Trump’s poll numbers are in freefall, the midterms are coming, and the man has publicly whined about needing to campaign more to talk about his 'accomplishments.' So what does this talentless hack do? He invents accomplishments. He takes a concept, a pipe dream Sullivan has been masturbating to for years, slaps an absurd price tag on it, and declares it a done deal facilitated by his glorious leadership. It’s a fucking confidence trick aimed at the dumbest people in the country, and Sullivan is his grinning hype man. They’re trying to sell Alaska a pipeline that’s made entirely of hot air, political desperation, and outright lies. The only gas being exported here is the toxic cloud of bullshit emanating from the White House podium.
