The facts
President Donald Trump announced an agreement with Russian President Vladimir Putin for Russia to supply the United States with over 300,000 tons of diesel immediately, with additional shipments of 500,000 tons in November and 4 million tons later. According to AP, this arrangement marks a reversal of the U.S. policy that banned Russian oil imports following Russia's invasion of Ukraine. The deal was announced amidst rising fuel prices, which AP linked to the U.S. conflict with Iran. U.S. diesel prices averaged nearly $6.28 per gallon on Friday, a significant increase from approximately $3.68 a year prior, and following a record high of $6.53 on September 22. Energy policy experts consulted by AP expressed skepticism that the increased Russian diesel supply would substantially lower prices. They suggested the additional fuel might simply be rerouted from other international buyers, potentially having a limited impact on overall market dynamics and consumer costs.
Our take
Well, well, well. The great dealmaker is back at it, and this time he’s secured a real humdinger: the privilege of buying diesel from a war criminal at what will likely be the same sky-high price. Donald Trump, the man who once claimed his bone spurs made him unfit for service, has found the backbone to crawl to Vladimir Putin and ask for a crude-oil handshake. He’s agreed to take Putin’s diesel - over 300,000 tons of the shit immediately, with promises of millions more - because nothing says ‘America First’ like becoming a dependent client state of the Kremlin the second gasoline gets pricey. What a patriotic little cunt. The real kicker, the part that makes this whole pathetic spectacle so fucking hilarious, is that the experts say it won’t even work. The added supply is unlikely to significantly reduce prices. So Trump didn’t just sell out a core U.S. policy banning Russian oil over its invasion of Ukraine; he did it for a symbolic gallon of fuel that will probably just get shipped away from some other country, leaving American drivers still getting reamed at the pump. He reversed sanctions for a PR stunt. A useless, groveling, expensive PR stunt. This is the geopolitical equivalent of paying a bully for the honor of him pissing in your gas tank. The man’s entire brand is built on being a tough guy, but when the chips are down, he immediately scampers to the one dictator who famously owns him, begging for a drip-feed of diesel like a junkie at the pharmacy. What a weak, pathetic, stupid fucking show. It’s a deal only a grifter could love: all the humiliation, none of the savings. Bravo, you treasonous prick. Bravo.
