The facts
Saudi Arabia's Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman cultivated a close relationship with former US President Donald Trump, characterized by substantial arms deals and investments in American companies. Following Trump's return to the White House in January 2025, Prince Mohammed pledged to invest $600 billion in the US over four years, later increasing the figure to nearly $1 trillion. This relationship was intended to ensure US protection for the kingdom. However, as Houthi attacks on Saudi territory intensified, the US reportedly turned down calls from Prince Mohammed for direct military intervention. The Houthis, allied with Iran, escalated their actions, including a cruise missile attack on Riyadh's international airport on October 10, 2026, which resulted in casualties. Despite these attacks, Trump has been non-committal about ordering US airstrikes against the rebels. Columnist Mohamad Bazzi suggests this situation highlights Saudi Arabia's miscalculation in relying on Trump's transactional approach for security, especially as the conflict risks wider regional escalation. Bazzi also notes that Saudi investments, including those in Jared Kushner's firm and the Trump Organization, have not yielded the expected security guarantees. The article points to Trump's past protection of Prince Mohammed following the assassination of Jamal Khashoggi as an example of their prior alignment, contrasting it with the current lukewarm US support.
Our take
Well, well, well. Look who just learned that paying a grifter a trillion dollars doesn’t buy you an air force, just a golden-plated 'fuck you.' Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, the absolute cunt who thought he could murder a journalist and buy his way into permanent protection, has discovered that Donald Trump’s loyalty lasts exactly as long as the last check clears. The prince spent years deep-throating Trump’s ego with arms deals, investments in Jared Kushner’s grift shop, and promises of hundreds of billions more, all under the pathetic belief that this would make America his personal bodyguard. What a fucking clown.
Now the Houthis, who give exactly zero shits about how much money you poured into a failing golf course, are launching cruise missiles at Riyadh’s airport and killing people. And when Prince Dickhead picks up the phone to whine at his favorite orange bastard, what does he get? Crickets. Trump, the world’s most transactional prick, has apparently decided that starting a new war is bad for his brand, or maybe he’s just waiting for the next installment of the bribe. The US reportedly turned down calls for direct military intervention, leaving the Saudis to eat their own expensive, useless bullshit. So much for that 'special relationship' built on corpses and cash.
Let’s be clear: this is the most expensive case of buyer’s remorse in geopolitical history. The prince thought he was purchasing the US military on a subscription plan, but all he got was a used-car salesman who sold him a lemon with 'protection' written on the side in Sharpie. He even upped his suck-up offer from six hundred billion to nearly a trillion dollars after Trump slithered back into the White House, like a desperate sugar baby increasing the allowance hoping this time daddy will love him. Instead, he gets to watch his cities get bombed while Trump stays non-committal, probably because calculating the profit margin on a war is harder than stealing from a charity.
The whole pathetic saga proves that betting your national security on a con man who can’t tell the difference between an ally and a marks is a recipe for getting your ass handed to you. The prince’s entire strategy was to buy the man who protected him after the Khashoggi murder, forgetting that Trump only protects people as long as the cameras are on and the checks don’t bounce. Now the cameras are on burning Saudi airports, and the checks have evidently stopped working. Enjoy your trillion-dollar lesson in why you shouldn’t base foreign policy on sucking up to a dickhead. You bought the bullshit, now choke on it.
