The facts
Iraq's parliament has completed Prime Minister Ali al-Zaidi’s government by approving 11 cabinet posts and three deputy prime ministers. The vote on Thursday confirmed individuals for portfolios including defense and interior ministers. However, a vote on the nominee for migration and displacement minister was postponed due to party disagreements. Among the approved deputy prime ministers is Laith al-Khazali, a senior figure in the Iran-backed Asaib Ahl al-Haq movement. The US designated Asaib Ahl al-Haq as a foreign terrorist organization in 2020 and has sanctioned both Laith and his brother, Qais al-Khazali, for their alleged roles in killing protesters and other attacks. Al-Zaidi urged his ministers to serve with commitment and integrity, stating the government faces severe economic challenges exacerbated by the US-Israel war on Iran. He noted that Iraq requires approximately 10 trillion dinars monthly for salaries and essential spending, a situation worsened by liquidity shortages stemming from the conflict. Al-Zaidi also mentioned inheriting significant public debt and vowed to combat corruption and seek the withdrawal of US forces.
Our take
Well, shit. It looks like Iraq's parliament has finally finished assembling its government, and in a stunning display of absolute fucking genius, they've decided to make a senior member of a US-designated foreign terrorist organization a deputy prime minister. Laith al-Khazali, from the Iran-backed Asaib Ahl al-Haq, is now officially part of the furniture. You know, the same group the US labeled a terrorist outfit in 2020, and the same guy the US sanctioned for allegedly having a hand in killing protesters. What a sterling fucking choice for a leadership role. It's like staffing a fire department with arsonists.
Prime Minister Ali al-Zaidi then had the gall to stand up and urge his new ministers to serve with 'commitment and integrity.' Integrity? You've just installed a guy from a murderous militia into the heart of your government, you absolute hypocrites. The fucking nerve of it. He then whined about severe economic challenges, blaming the US-Israel war on Iran for liquidity shortages. Sure, pal. It's definitely that, and not the catastrophic corruption and the brilliant idea of giving political power to violent extremist dickheads that has your treasury looking emptier than a promise from a politician.
This prick also mentioned inheriting significant public debt and vowed to combat corruption. How the fuck do you combat corruption when you're literally handing a seat at the table to a sanctioned terrorist? That's not fighting corruption; that's institutionalizing it. It's like hiring a kleptomaniac to run a jewelry store and then being shocked when the diamonds go missing. His other big promise was to seek the withdrawal of US forces. Gee, I wonder why a government that just promoted a terrorist might want the Americans to leave? It's a real head-scratcher.
The whole pathetic circus is a masterclass in how to fail at statecraft. They couldn't even agree on a migration minister, but sure, let's fast-track the terrorist guy. Priorities, you know? Al-Zaidi says they need 10 trillion dinars a month just for salaries and essentials. Maybe stop spending your political capital on making friends with murderous cunts and you might find a few extra bucks down the back of the parliamentary sofa. This isn't governance; it's a slow-motion suicide pact dressed up in cheap suits. What a bunch of useless, treacherous bastards.
